From Saturday, July 24th through Friday, July 30th of this year, I was blessed to be able to spend a week at the IOCC Serv-X-Treme Leadership Conference through the kindness and beneficence of His Eminence Metropolitan Nicolae. I was one of eighteen Orthodox Christians from various archdioceses who are entering the final year of high school this fall and were invited to learn about the mission of IOCC and Orthodox Christian almsgiving.
I always had the notion that there was one general expression of charity. However, I learned at the Serv-X-Treme Annual Youth Leadership Program that there is such a thing as “toxic charity”. Unfortunately, our desire to be generous and helpful to our brothers and sisters often inadvertently causes more harm than benefit. There were two examples that were quite eye-opening to me. The first story we heard was of a low-income father who is unable to provide Christmas presents for his children. We learned from the story how a charity providing gifts directly to a family can be harmful to the harmony and relationships of the family. When a charity organization plays the role of a savior for a family, the family is not united but rather sees the father as lacking. This well-meaning charitable act reinforces the notion that the father of the family is unable to support his family, and his gifts and work for the family are not sufficient. Situations that undermine the efforts of the father to provide for his family do not encourage the father to continue in his efforts to support his family and quite often falsely convince the father that he is unnecessary to his own family. Charity organizations that focus on a father’s strength and willingness to provide for his own family produce healthier family dynamics.
One of the suggestions implemented by different charity organizations is the system of the voucher. Some charities provide opportunities for the father of the family to work for vouchers that can be redeemed at the charity organization’s resource center for Christmas presents. With this model, the children see their father as their source of Christmas joy, and the father sees himself as an able provider. Unfortunately, many charity organizations choose to give alms not in ways that are beneficial to others but rather in ways that end up being deleterious. The first example explained the difference between undermining versus supporting family relationships with our almsgiving. In addition, we also learned how to think through the consequences of our actions in a community setting.
To help us understand actions in a community, we were given an example of two African villages that were provided with a well pump. One village was provided with a well pump and would rely on the availability of the charity organization to return to fix the pump when it would break. The second village was taught how to maintain and service a well pump. A charitable gift can provide independence and self-reliance when the almsgiving is donated with knowledge and the ability to support the gift. To help us further understand the importance of strengthening and supporting those that we help, we were given the book Toxic Charity by Robert D. Lupton to read.
Serv-X-Treme gave us the opportunities for acts of service that implemented the understanding of wise almsgiving. We assembled hygiene kits to help the homeless who were transitioning to half-way housing so they would have the means to practice self-care. We also painted an elderly man’s house to help him live in his house with self-respect and maintain the condition of his home. It was helpful to have the discussion and teaching of wise giving followed by concrete acts of service.
After this great blessing of participating in Serv-X-Treme, I am inspired to share what I learned with the youth at my parish and to direct our almsgiving in supportive acts for our community and individuals. Our Orthodox Christian life consists of prayer, fasting, and almsgiving. Through the love and generosity of my Orthodox Christian community, I have grown in understanding and practice of these spiritually nourishing actions. Just as my time in vigil during the ROYA retreats has inspired and strengthened my prayer life, so has IOCC Serv-X-Treme inspired and strengthened my almsgiving.
Before my week at Serv-X-Treme, I did not understand how small acts of almsgiving can have such a large impact on someone else’s life. With a gift of an hour’s time and fourteen dollars, we can make a six-month supply hygiene kit for someone attempting to transition out of a homeless lifestyle. It does not take that much time and effort to make a significant impact on another’s life. Just as I learned about the homeless transitioning to self-care, I learned to appreciate my transition to being fully responsible for my spiritual life as a young adult.
As an Orthodox Christian, I must incorporate all three aspects of the spiritual life. Fasting is encountered whenever we decide what we eat, prayer is part of our daily life, but with almsgiving we must look up from our life and see those around us. This opportunity has inspired and changed the way I interact with others.
I am grateful and in spiritual debt to His Eminence Metropolitan Nicolae for allowing me to correct and improve the way I see almsgiving and learn how to perform acts of love towards my brothers and sisters with discernment and beneficence.
Ștefan Aniței,
Houston, TX
